13 things I learned this weekend

Posted on 12. Jul, 2009 by Keith Scott in Uncategorized

I didn’t go to a seminar

I didn’t read a new training book

I didn’t attend the latest $15,000 “get rich quick” mastermind group

I didn’t participate in any “conference calls” with the smartest “gurus”

I went to the shore….the Jersey Shore

1. When you are in a bar with a live band, it pays to be bigger and stronger then the people around you. So, when some 22-year-old dork who is dressed just like the dweebs from the “Hills” starts moshing and is coming dangerously close to slamming into you, giving him a good elbow in the sternum or back of the neck, usually keeps him and the rest of his “crew” away from you for the rest of the night.

2. If you think you are fat and out of shape, spend the day on the beach and you will feel so much better about yourself. Since when did they start selling bikinis in double XLs?

3. Going off of your “diet” is much easier when you are on vacation. Realizing that you need to start back on the diet is even easier when you are headed back home and feel like a swollen tick.

4. If you are on a low carb, low fat diet, DO NOT go to the boardwalk. The chances of finding a meal without fat or carbs on the boardwalk is slim to none.

5. If you spend more then 3 days at a shore “resort” area, you will probably gain weight unless you are highly disciplined.

6. Overweight parents, usually have overweight kids. Spend the day at the beach and look around. You will rarely find this not to be true.

7. Almost always, the “biggest” guys on the beach have legs of a 13 year old girl. Its still a mystery to me why so many guys refuse to train their legs.

8. The ladies who actually “fit” into their bikinis the best, usually are skin and bones. I didn’t see too many girls that had much muscle tone. The opposite was more true. See number 2.

9. Getting rid of painful knots in the form of soft-tissue work is much easier after you have had a few drinks. : )

10. Kids on the beach who had a choice between fruit or cookies almost always picked the cookies. I bet if there was only a choice between fruit and lets say…another fruit, would have thinner kids.

11.There should be a law about getting a tribal band tattoo on around your upper arm unless you actually have some girth around your upper arm.

12. If you are a guy who has so much body hair that it looks like you are wearing a thick sweater, you don’t need sun screen… you need a razor.

13. Spending $4.50 on a bottle of Corona instead of $1.00 on a bottle of Miller Lite makes no sense to me especially if you are buying for a group of people. The Lime in the bottle must be worth the extra $3.50.